Want stage confidence? Fix your content first

If you’re searching for hacks to help you build stage confidence, you might be tackling the wrong problem.

The fix doesn’t begin with delivery tips.

It starts by getting clear on what you need to say and why.

Discover what public speakers often miss — and three things you need to do first to start building stage confidence.

Young businesswoman speaking confidently to a group of professionals in a conference setting

Emerging leaders, technical experts and even some senior leaders struggling to prepare for an important speech or presentation often open up and share their top-of-mind worries with me:

“I’m so nervous every time I present.”
“Public speaking is really hard for me.”
“I’m so afraid I’m going to bomb it.”
“Why would anyone want to listen to me?”

On the face of it, these worries point to a confidence problem.

But in my experience, these worries are often the first symptoms of a content problem.

Time and again, I have seen this:

Content breeds confidence onstage.

In other words:

Own your content — and you own your confidence.

Let’s talk about what this means and why this is true.

Presenters often tackle the wrong problem first

Presenters who feel nervous, or find public speaking difficult, or fear failure tend to diagnose the problem as stage confidence.

Then they attempt to address their perceived deficit in stage confidence by absorbing delivery tips online, reading books on executive presence and body language tips for executives, and watching YouTube videos rich with advice on shedding imposter syndrome.

These presenters are eager to fix how they show up — before they’ve done the harder work of getting clear on what they need to say and why.

As a result — even after doing all this upfront work to improve their stage confidence — here’s what happens when they start rehearsing their important speech or presentation:

They still feel nervous.

They still think public speaking is hard.

They’re still afraid they’re going to bomb it.

And they wonder aloud once again:

“Why would anyone want to listen to me?”

What sabotages stage confidence first

In my work with scores of speakers over the past 15 years, here’s what I’ve discovered:

Man in business attire with a thoughtful expression

Most nervous speakers finding it difficult to deliver an important speech or presentation with confidence are likely struggling first for these reasons:

They haven’t thought deeply enough about their idea and their content.
They don’t have a single, clear message that matters to them and to their audience.
They’re not 100% proud of what they’ve prepared to say.

In short:

They don’t own their content — with their head, heart, gut and hands.

When you own your content with your head — you understand it. You know exactly what you are saying, you know the structure, and you know your point.
When you own your content with your heart — you care deeply about your message. It matters to you. And you know it matters to your audience.
When you own your content with your gut — you trust it. You know the message is right, and you’re ready to stand behind it. You don’t second-guess it.
When you own your content with your hands — you feel well-prepared, practiced and poised — excited and eager to deliver what you’ve come to say to your audience.

There’s always a turning point

A few years ago, I worked with Anthony: an emerging leader who was getting his first shot onstage delivering a high-stakes talk at his company, a national audience of thousands.

Like any new speaker, Anthony was nervous and little unsure about what to say.

He came to our first meeting like new speakers sometimes do: with handfuls of random ideas, quotes, cliches and lessons (some borrowed from speakers he had heard in the recent past); a few stories from milestones in his work life; and a couple of possible themes.

Businesswoman actively discussing a topic with a colleague

Anthony was all over the place.

He lacked confidence.

But as we talked, things changed.

I began asking him a series of clarifying questions that got him to think deeply about a big idea he had, along with his own content — mostly personal experiences — to support his big idea.

We talked some more, and soon, a couple of strong, potential messages stood out to me.

The more we talked, the clearer it became how deeply these messages mattered to him and to his audience.

Before long, the structure of his talk began to emerge, and Anthony’s demeanor shifted from confusion to conviction.

Confidence showed up.

Anthony was finally seeing all the possibilities — and feeling proud of what he could say and why.

What happened next

We worked together to build out, revise and polish his remarks — from his opening to his closing — and everything in-between.

He put in the work, practicing and rehearsing on his own before and after our speech coaching sessions.

During our third and final session just days before his big event, Anthony was excited and ready to speak.

After this last rehearsal, Anthony told me:

Businessman in a suit speaking into a microphone and engaging a group

“It just flows nice and succinctly … it felt pretty natural … really good.”
“If I get tripped up, I can manage through that very easily.”
“I can pause and then hit that (line) … I know the flow right after.”

Because Anthony owned his content, he owned his confidence.

His words to me that day were the words of a speaker whose content breeds confidence onstage.

And it did.

After the event, Anthony messaged me and said, “I had fun doing it! I’m grateful for having gone through this process.”

What’s more:

The feedback he received from attendees during and after the event shored up his stage confidence even further, reinforcing his readiness for the next time his senior leader would ask him to speak in public. Here’s what attendees said:

“You’re amazing, Anthony!”
“Great story of determination and focus.”
“Love your transparency, humbleness and leadership, Anthony. You are very inspiring!”
“Powerful story. Thanks for sharing!”
“Everyone should cultivate your drive for success, Anthony!”
“Love these lessons!”
“Thank you, Anthony, for sharing your story! I understand you and your work ethic. Hug your mom, as I know she is proud.”

Here’s the takeaway (what begins to shape a confident presenter)

If you think deeply about your idea and your content … land on a single, clear message that matters to you and to your audience … and feel 100% proud of what you’ve prepared to say — confidence follows because you’ve done the hard work first.

You’ve let content breed confidence onstage.

But what about a speaker who does have strong content — but still feels nervous and lacks stage confidence?

Typically it’s because this is the first time the speaker has ever had a talk aligned with their head, heart, gut and hands: a speech or presentation they are truly proud of and want to share.

Rear view of a businesswoman speaking to a large audience

All this speaker needs to succeed now is experience delivering that speech or presentation through multiple practices and rehearsals, and perhaps a bit of coaching from a professional speech coach to help bring that speaker to the finish line.

Speakers, experts and leaders at any level who let content breed confidence onstage gain visibility, earn new opportunities and see their ideas change the way people think or behave.

If you can do this, you can redefine the direction of your career.